Forgiveness for Infidelity?

I just finished watching a movie called The Last Kiss and it dealt a lot with forgiveness and trying at relationships and how hard we have to try to make them work. And I started to think about my future relationship and I mean my marriage.

I started to wonder that if my husband or fiance or boyfriend ever cheated on me, would I be able to forgive him. In the movie the main characters are about to have a baby buy Micheal the lead guy, seems scared and confused, while Jenna is planning to buy a house. And while she is dealing with her own parent's separation Micheal finds a young girl that makes him feel ten years younger. He has a fling with her and Jenna finds out. He begs her forgiveness but she doesn't want to forgive him for what he has done for fear it will happen again and because she may never be able to trust him again.

In the end they work it out because they have been together for three years and they're going to have a baby together but at that point I wondered if I could do the same thing in that exact situation and I don't think that I could.

I have seen the effects infidelity has on a marriage and they are not pretty. I don't think I could forgive someone who claims to love me and then cheats on me. I always hear the same thing, yeah I loved you but I did this and it meant nothing. Well I believe that if you love someone you would never cheat on them. And I have also heard the argument that men are men and they will do what men do but I don't believe that either. If a woman can be monogamous why can't a man?

And I know that women cheat too but I'm a woman and he would be cheating on me...I'm not saying women don't cheat. I'm saying that I would walk away. I have also heard the argument well...we've been together for a long time or we have children together and it was just a lapse of judgement but I don't believe that either.

Trust is very important and I don't think I would ever be able to trust him again..and I think I could just walk away..why should I give him a second chance? I don't think my heart could take the ultimate betrayal one more time.....I hope he will be very unhappy and I hope to be very happy but once a cheater always a cheater and I don't believe in forgiving them....

House, need I say more?

Traditions

Today I made tamales with my family. I sat in a chair and for about three hours straight helped my mom spread the flour mixture on the wet corn husk leaves. Funny thing is that every year she says she will never make them again because it is too much hard work. But today while she and I sat there working diligently, she told me we were making them to keep with tradition. She said she remembered making tamales in Mexico when she was a little girl and told me how they had to pick their own leaves, instead of buying the bagged ones we did, and they had to grind their own flour.

That got me to thinking about traditions and how many we let slip away when we come to the US. I know there is a larger Latin community now then there ever was, especially that of Mexicans but sometimes I feel we are giving up our traditions to try to fit in with the people of this country. Sometimes I feel we try too hard and no matter what we do they still see us as those Mexicans that don't belong here.

So I just looked at my mother and kept on spreading the mixture on the corn leaves until my hands hurt from holding the leaves up and until my right middle finger hurt from holding the spoon and thought about sitting there one day with my niece and doing the exact same thing....

Rest and Relaxation

Tomorrow is the last day I work before my vacation and I'm so excited about it. I can't wait to just sit back and relax for a while. Some of you may not think that working at a bank is stressful but it is. You have to deal with money and trying not too lose it by cashing a bad check and you have to deal with the customers that don't agree with your policies.

But all of my ten days are going to be spent relaxing and playing with my niece and my cat Luna and maybe a little shopping in between. I really wanted to go to Mexico to visit my aunts but it will not be possible. My parents are going in February but I can't take a vacation so soon next year after I'm taking this one now.

Maybe during my vacation I'll finally finish the short story I've been working on and I'll write more poetry. I've written a few these past weeks but lately I've been blocked. I think this vacation is just what I need to get the creative juices flowing....

I'm almost there...just a bit to go

If You Please

It was a rough day today at work. It seems like every rude person in the world showed up to the bank and that about 60% came to me. I just don't know what's wrong with people these days. I recently posted about rude America, but now it's far more then that. I think some of these people need etiquette lessons.

The way they act and express themselves is not right. But I guess that's just my opinion. And I'm not saying that certain people, like rich people, are more mannered. A lot of the rude people we get are people that have some money. They think they can do and say what they want because they have a few bills. Well let me tell you that money does not buy respect, it just rents it for a while.

You have to be respectful to others if you want respect. It doesn't matter what industry they work in, we should treat each other like human beings. Some people believe that if you work in the service industry they can treat you like crap. That is not right. I don't have to kiss your ass because I work at a bank that depends on your business. I will do my job but that's it.

About four months ago I was working and we closed the drive-thru at five after. A little late, then I was putting my work up when I hear a honking, and my associate who was helping someone that the personal banker had been helping told me someone was at the commercial window. Well I went to see what was going on and it was a lady that said she wanted to get a check cashed and I told her we were closed. Well she said she needed it because she was going on vacation, I said OK that I would do it and to put her stuff in the tray. Well I did her transaction and after she took her stuff she threw a ten in the tray and said "This is for the overtime."

That was a very rude comment. I don't need her money. And my job with the customers ends at 5:00 pm when the open sign turns to off. So I just put her money back into her account. That was a total slap in the face and she knew it. People like that think that money solves everything. Well it doesn't and I'm not saying all people that have money, just some.

Well I try to treat everyone as I want to be treated and I always always stay calm when an issue arises at a restaurant or anywhere like that because I know how it is and I don't want to be yelled at for something that is beyond my control.

Here's to everyone walking a mile in someone else's shoes.....
It also doesn't hurt to say please or thank you....

Rain

I love the smell of rain. I don't know why but I just love the smell of rain hitting the earth. It smells so alive, so fresh, so earthy. I wish I could bottle that smell and keep it with me. But I think if I were to try to do that it would take away from its freshness.

This weekend was a pretty gloomy day here in the Sunshine State. It was cloudy almost all weekend and on Saturday it rained almost all day. But I loved it. I loved to look out my window and see the rain coming down. I loved to watch the trees gently sway back and forth as the wind passed through their leaves. It all seemed like a dance. Sometimes on days like that I just lay on my bed and stare out my window into the sky and the trees.

On days like those I get the urge to run out and dance in the rain with my hands stretched up high...but such fanciful thoughts are for children...well maybe. Maybe one day I will do just that. I will go out and let the cool rain fall on my face and I will smell it's freshness. And for just a moment I will be a part of that magical dance that we so often watch through a window....

I love the rain....

Lights

Yesterday after my niece woke up from a very long nap my mom and I decided to take her around the neighborhoods to see the Christmas lights. Now that she is two she can enjoy them more then last year. So we started taking her around some houses that my mom knows have great decorations.

We took her to a few houses and at one they had some reindeer and a train..well she really liked the reindeer display. She wanted to get off and play with them but we told her those were the lady's lights and could only look. Then we started showing her other houses but she kept asking about the reindeer. Well some of the houses didn't have them, they just had lights or snowmen, which she calls penguins, and some Santa clause figures.

Well we pull up to this house that has some really pretty lights and she doesn't see the Santa so she says, oh he's in the bathroom and I say yes. Then she says, where are the reindeer? I tell her, oh they went to sleep. And suddenly I hear this cry...she had started crying..and saying " no they didn't go to sleep no they didn't go to sleep." I was so surprised, I said no they didn't and we pulled into a house that had some reindeer. After that she said let's go home...so we came back home....

She liked the lights and love the reindeer but now I know never to tell her that they went to sleep...kids really are the cutest things....